ID Humor

Scientist, writer, and artist John McLoughlin (who should be better known-- I am a great fan of his science fiction novel The Helix and the Sword, as are Odious and Peculiar) has sent me two irreverent little pieces on Intelligent Design. The first I reprint in full:

"from the Institute for Science and Stork Research:

Two different theories exist concerning the
origin of children: the theory of
Sexual Reproduction, and the theory of the Stork.
Many people believe in the theory of
sexual reproduction because they have been
taught this theory at school.
In reality, however, many of the world's
leading scientists are in favor of the
theory of the stork.

If the theory of sexual reproduction is
taught in schools, it must only be taught
as a theory and not as the truth.
Alternative theories, such as the theory of
the stork, must also be taught.

Evidence supporting the theory of the stork
includes the following:

1. It is a scientifically established fact that
the stork does exist. This can be confirmed by
any ornithologist.

2. The theory of sexual reproduction contains
several features that it is unable to explain.

3. The theory of sexual reproduction implies that
a child is approximately nine months old at birth.
This is an absurd claim. Everyone knows that
a newborn child is newborn.

4. According to the theory of sexual reproduction,
children are a result of sexual intercourse.
There are, however, several well-documented
cases where sexual intercourse has not led to
the birth of a child.

5. Statistical studies in the Netherlands
indicate a positive correlation between
the human birth rate and the number of storks.
Both are decreasing.

6. The theory of the stork can be investigated by
rigorous scientific methods. The only assumption
involved is that children are delivered by the stork.

The second is by Paul Rudnick from the New Yorker, and features a veritable patheon of the gods, squabbling like interior designers over the esthetics of Earth. It is too long to reprint , but this will give you the flavor:

"It's wet, it's deep, yet it's frothy; it's design without dogma," said Buddha, approvingly.

"Now, there's movement," agreed Allah. "It's not just 'Hi, I'm a planet-no splashing.' "

"But are those ice caps?" inquired Thor. "Is this a coherent vision, or a highball?"